Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
Randomize
