we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
