OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
