Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
