I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
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