Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
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