I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
Use "feeling words"
Yay
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
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