i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Randomize
