He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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