how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
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