OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
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