Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
Someone came in the potted fern
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
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