It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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