There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
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