question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
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