Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
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