Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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