dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
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