I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
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