how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
