Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
I still have a little drunk in my system
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
Randomize