They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
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