the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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