im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
Randomize
