it hurts more in the daytime
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
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