this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Randomize
