i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
Randomize
