it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
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