K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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