Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
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