Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Randomize