Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
