Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
