Im at strip club and am horny
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize
