Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Randomize
