I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
