I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
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