I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
