I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
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