I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
Randomize
