So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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