I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Randomize
