question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
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