i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
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