i barfeds in our rink
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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