If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
We're not piercing ourselves today.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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