Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
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