If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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