i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Randomize
