Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
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