Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
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